ONE SPICY MEATBALL

Spring has Sprung

2010-03-10T20:40:00.000-08:00

Well not officially, but my pee smells like asparagus again, so it's real close.

NO-COOK FRIDAY NIGHT

2009-08-07T19:14:00.000-07:00

On the menu tonight courtesy of St. Francis Fountain, the historical nerve center of hipsters in plaid and filth:

One malted milkshake (shown)
BLT with french fries (consumed in record time, not pictured)
One pack each of Close Encounters of the Third Kind and Dark Crystal Trading Cards (inedible gum circa 1978)

D tried to go all "healthy" and order the Sides Platter which was soup, salad (is Thousand Island healthy?) and mac n cheese.
He didn't even want a bite of my bacon sandwich. Something's up. I think he's having an affair. With a Gelfling!

FRITTATA CRAZY!

2009-08-02T11:58:00.000-07:00

I recently re-discovered how easy it is to whip up a frittata.
You can pretty much put anything you want in it (my grandma used ground beef and spinach), and it works for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

This morning's version had fresh corn, red onion, veggie sausage, kalamata olive, and Cowgirl Creamery feta and goat cheese.

The kicker was the tomato/basil mix I spooned on top after. Summery!

A few carbs never hurt anybody, so I toasted up some Acme sweet baguette and broke open a fresh jar of Knoll Farms fig jam.
Easy like Sunday morning...

I SCREAM

2009-06-18T20:22:00.000-07:00

In case you hadn't heard, there's an ice cream revolution going on.
Like plaid and Ray-Bans, gourmet ice cream shops are trendy y'all.

If ice cream were a hipster, it would be Humphry Slocombe.
Some of Slocombe's unexpected flavors include salt and pepper, balsamic caramel, McEvoy olive oil, chocolate taragon, foie gras (seriously), and the already legendary "secret breakfast"--a hangover-friendly combo of Jim Beam and cornflakes.
I had that and the coconut sherbet, then went home and took some Lactaid.

If you don't want to ride your fixie all the way over to Harrison and 24th cuz your ripped, gray skinny jeans are too tight, and your I-have-way-too-many-keys-and-I'm-not-even-a-building-engineer keychain is too heavy, you can also check out more regular and mainstream flavors at 3 Twins, Xanath, Bi-Rite, and Mitchells.

But my absolute favorite new-to-me spot is Sketch in Berkeley on Fourth Street.
It's a husband and wife operation doing soft-serve made from scratch every day. If ice cream were a cute, understated, pure and loveable gal (like me), it would be Sketch.
They make homemade waffles to put underneath, and salted caramel to put on top.
This is not unlike my previous favorite chemically enhanced Hot Caramel Sundae at McDonalds, except it is. Thank the sweet Dairy Gods for that.
You can probably even get it with nuts.

Despite the howling coastal winds, it's summer!

FIRST TIME WITH MR. PICKLE

2009-06-14T20:25:00.000-07:00

I've been innocent way too long about this whole pickling business.

So, yesterday at the farmers market I filled up a bag with four-inch kirby cucumbers intending to put them to work today.
Size-queens take note: with pickling, smaller is better; you can cram more in; they are sweeter and less likely to go soft and rotten.
Always something new to learn, see?

I went for a "half-sour" recipe from the Joy of Pickling, which seems to be the best resource available.
The basic idea is to ferment the cukes in spiced brine at room temperature for up to 3 days, then refrigerate them for a week or so before eating your way to half-sour heaven.
The most important thing is to keep the chilitos completely submerged, or you'll end up with a bum pickle.
This method isn't FDA approved or anything so I'll let you know how it turns out. I hope they are delicious!

After all that, we had Kelton and Alex over to watch the LA Lame-kers game. Grillmaster D fired up some sausages and corn on the cob, among things. Guess there was a theme today.
Go Magic!
Red Wings?!
Darnit.

SUMMER BOUNTY

2009-06-13T20:03:00.000-07:00

List: corn, blueberries, strawberries, plums, nectarines, blood orange, avocado, red onion, tomatoes, little gem lettuce, garlic, portabellas and king trumpet mushrooms, cherries, rock cod, radishes, pickling cucumbers, dill (more on this later).
Score.

FIELD OF DREAMS

2009-05-25T15:44:00.000-07:00

It was going to take something special to get me back on the blog.
Not Heidi and Spencer getting married, not Adam Lambert's gayness, something even more delicious.
The farm dinner we went to a few weeks ago, and D's subsequent Campylobacter poisoning (unrelated), were just the things.

Friends Kate and Aaron took us to Outstanding in the Field, a farm-to-table dining extravaganza, hosted by Santa Cruz native Jim Denevan.
This guy had swagger.
These traveling dinner parties happen all over the country (even in Canada, eh), pairing up a local farmer and chef for an outdoor dining adventure featuring the farm's products and the chef's expertise.
A few basics: you can't be a wimp about bugs or weather; it's probably not a good idea to wear five-inch heels (somebody did anyway); and you're gonna be dining with complete strangers, so buck up and make a new friend or take a Xanax already.

We were greeted in the parking lot by the first of many fresh-faced farmgirls that are part of the whole Outstanding experience. A stylish shuttlebus with Carnival Cruiseline upholstry carried us (at alarming speeds) over a secret bridge, up sloping hills to a peak atop Devil's Gulch Ranch.
Beautiful, even through the fog.

After a few glasses of introductory Stubbs Chardonnay and many rounds of superlative crostini (with fava beans, mint and fresh sheep's milk ricotta), we took a picturesque path through the vineyard for the pig tour.
Yes, pig tour!
We met day-old piglets and while it was hard to imagine them as dinner-ready in a few months, our guilt subsided once we encountered the aroma of slow-roasted porchetta warming on the grill, manned by Perbacco chef Staffan Terje.

The meal was a locavore's wet dream. Burrata cheese with grilled Zuckerman Farm asparagus. Devil's Gulch rabbit ravioli. The aforementioned pork with cherry panzanella.
And if I wasn't full by then, I definitely was after the beautiful Yerena Farm strawberry crostata with Bellwether creme fraiche was served up.
Swoon.
I went to bed singing EE-I-EE-I-O.

Special Packages

2009-01-28T17:25:00.000-08:00

My mom saves *everyday household item* boxes throughout the year, and then uses them for our Christmas presents. What a little recycler!
The winners this year:

Debbie Meyer's Bread Bags

Love her. I can't imagine a time I will ever have that much bread in my house. Unless maybe we're in a recession and I need to stock up...

And then there was this:

No wonder my dad hasn't been feeling well lately.

HOOF AND MOUTH

2009-01-25T17:23:00.000-08:00

I heard about this cafe-Stable-a while back and finally went over there for lunch. It's on Folsom near 18th and it really was a carriage house back in the day.
Now it's a light-filled spot with high ceilings and delicious items for sale.

I hear their De la Paz coffee ranks among the other overhyped micro-roasters (Blue Bottle, Ritual), but what do I know, I went for lunch.
I had the cream of mushroom soup, which wasn't too heavy and a quinoa salad, which wasn't too healthy. Voila.
No horse poop in sight.

BEEF AND SWINE IN '09

2009-01-18T20:43:00.000-08:00

Ever since my rich* husband got me the new MacBook Pro for a wedding present, you'd think I'd be blogging a lot more right?

Instead, I've been Facebooking my old Republican high school friends and obsessively watching Lonely Island videos. What's become of me?

Of course I've still been eating my ass off at various new places around the city, but I always forget to take pictures, or it's too dark to take pictures, or I can't deal with the fact that I take lousy pictures, so I just fuhgeddaboutit.
But like Lance Armstrong, I persevere.
It's time for a new president and a new blog!

D and I killed it at the new cheesesteak place in the Mission, Phat Philly a couple weeks ago. I don't claim to be a cheesesteak expert, but I do know that we left that place full of cheesy, meaty goodness and sometimes that is enough. Praise be to the almighty Pepto.

In keeping with the *Heathful Eating in 2009* theme, today we tried a new North Carolina BBQ spot (also in the soon-to-be-completely-gentrified Mission) Baby Blues.
My fellow foodie friend John Parker actually turned me on to this spot since I guess there's one down in SoCal too (Venice Beach).
Now, I DO claim to be somewhat of a BBQ expert since I did spend some time in a North Carolina prison many years ago, and Baby Blues was good.
It just wasn't pull-over-on-the-side-of-a-country-road-and-fill-your-gullet-with-authentic-Southern- BBQ-and-a-gallon-of-sweet-tea-at-a-plastic-tablecloth-covered-picnic table good.
Still, we make do with what we've got, and we got Memphis ribs, baby-back ribs, pulled pork (excellently smoky), cole slaw, baked beans, banana pudding and pecan pie. I'm not complaining that much.

See you soon! I swear!
*Rich in spirit, he drives a '98 Ford Taurus so get off my tip

OBSCENE

2008-12-04T09:06:00.000-08:00

I may not have anything else to say about bacon for a while...
Who knew you could weave it??

IS BACON SEXY?

2008-11-17T17:16:00.000-08:00

I vote yes.

PIZZA LOVE STORY...PHOTOS BY LORD CHEEZ

2008-11-17T14:56:00.000-08:00

The sun sets on my Arizmendi slice of the day (shiitake, portobello and button mushrooms with sesame-garlic-ginger vinaigrette)...

Hello? Pizza, is that you?

Let's do this!

GOZA GOZA TACO TRUCK

2008-11-14T12:58:00.000-08:00

I'm not always sure about taco trucks. It can go either way y'know?
But this guy (who's name happens to be Damian!) has been parked outside my work for weeks now and it's pretty much a sure thing.
When there's a Cuban special of the day, I get it.
It's always some variety of shredded or stewed meat, rice, beans and surprisingly high-quality tomatoes and avocado.
I also tried the carnitas quesadilla the other day, and I'm steadily gaining weight per my post-wedding diet plan.
Just kidding! I'm not gonna "let it all go" just cuz I got my man ok? Jeez.
Townsend and 5th, around 11am-2pm. Look for it, call me up and we'll lunch on the curb.

ALL MAVERICK-Y

2008-11-13T17:57:00.000-08:00

There's nothing like getting married, an historic election, and a mind-blowing dinner at Chez Panisse to get me back on the blog.
Hello my friends!
So it's true I'm married, and far from the lonely toothless life I had envisioned.

I've been back in the kitchen whipping up stuff like these easy-breezy Honey Glazed Carrots and Parsnips, and Pork Chops with Mustard Sauce.

But enough about that, let's talk about our (me and the hubbles) culinary extravaganza in the Gourmet Ghetto with our also-married friends Lisa and Nima.

The atmosphere was chillaxed as we settled in for the fixed four-course menu, and were greeted with a dish of superlative olives. I mean, they were "just" olives but every morsel at Chez Panisse seems to be elevated to a magical *this-is-the-best-thing-I've-ever-tasted* quality. And the hits kept coming.

First: warm frisee salad with artichokes, pancetta and egg...perfect.
Second: lobster soup with leeks and peas...sublime.
Third: grilled quail with green beans, wild mushrooms and roasted potatoes...may I have another.
Finale: apple and quince tart with buttermilk ice cream...who knew about buttermilk ice cream? Sold.

Alice Waters -- the O.G. of sustainability and farm to table dining -- even made an appearance, and I got all starstruck and tingly.
It was like my 10th birthday at the Rick Springfield concert all over again.
Alice Waters is Jessie's Girl!

Love,
Wifey Fagan

DOH

2008-08-04T14:41:00.000-07:00

As promised, I revisited fancy new Dynamo Donuts as part of my ongoing national donut review. This is the type of investigative blogging that I know you've come to expect from me.

Everything appears to be in order at Dynamo. There were two new flavors to sample, though there never seem to be more than 10 donuts available for purchase at any one time. Fights could break out.
But this isn't the type of donut factory where waterfalls of icing bathe 100 donuts at a time, so their precious unavailability is not surprising. Besides, at $6.50 for two donuts and a coffee, I wouldn't want to get three dozen for the office staff meeting anyway.

The spiced chocolate had a nice cake-like consistency and chili powder sugar coating. Interesting and enjoyable.
The frosted vanilla was fine. No grease or typical post-donut stomach bloat.

Basically I'm already a little bored with the place.
If I'm gonna go for a donut, or five, I want my teeth to hurt from the sugar.
I want to feel guilty. And I don't want to scramble for the last donut with a fixie-riding mission hipster in skinny jeans and ironically dirty/Day-glo/DIY t-shirt. There, I said it. Will skinny jeans ever go away?

CRUEL SUMMER

2008-08-01T10:55:00.000-07:00

Even though it's been 62 degrees this week (not including wind chill), and I'm wearing thick socks, it's still summer at the farmers market!
Hallelujah.

LONG LIVE THE DONUT

2008-07-23T10:30:00.000-07:00

When I was a cellulite-free shorty about 60 years ago, I ate donuts all the time. It was one of the few constants in my constantly relocatable life.
In Connecticut at Dunkin Donuts, I'd take anything with sprinkles, and a box of assorted Munchkins to go.
Canada was all about Bryan Adams, snow days and Timbits from Tim Hortons.

North Carolina = Krispy Kreme of course.
Even a box of chocolate wax-covered Entenmann's would do in an emergency donut situation.
You see the pattern. Lard + sugar never failed me.

Until now. I can't eat donuts more than twice a year. Who am I kidding. It's bad enough that cheese, butter, and bacon hold steady spots in my weekly culinary lineup. I have to make some sacrifices.
I thought this might get tricky with the opening (finally) of Dynamo Donuts on the soon-to-be-gentrified 24th street strip in the Mission. I've been stalking this place since I heard about their lemon-thyme honey-glazed gourmet donuts that were supposed to look like this:
Food porn.

Well they finally opened Tuesday and I ended up with a maple, bacon apple donut (there were only three left when I got there at 8:50am) that looked like that.

Not bad. Eh. The maple was a little dry and not that maple-y. The bacon sprinkles on top were just enough, and I did get a few chunks of apple in the donut part. Since they've only been open two days, I'll probably have to go back next week for quality assurance purposes and further investigative research. Stay tuned.
Is there such a thing as a "donut top"?

INSPIRATION

2008-07-01T13:58:00.000-07:00

Planning a wedding is no joke. It takes time y'know? But I'm still making time to eat at my favorites and discover new spots. Here's a quick rundown.

Discovery: BOCCALONE. Meat. That's pretty much it. Chris Cosentino, my local chef crush #1 has opened up shop in the Ferry Plaza building. See for yourself. Brown sugar and fennel salumi. You are not on a diet.

SPORK. Previously reviewed, but here's a pic of their "inside out" burger. That's cheese, meat, tomato, bun, meat. Cutesy but delish.
UNIVERSAL CAFE. Always solid. Ricotta and parsley raviolini with fresh peas and favas. Sea bass with corn and pesto. Bunuelos with chocolate and cream. What's a bunuelo? It's like a donut crossed with a yorkshire pudding. Classic. Just like Freddy Jackson.

GRILLING We've been going nuts. Buffalo, goat, corn, zucchini, you name it. Grilled buffalo is the "it" meat of the moment. It's lean and mellow, just like me.

Discovery: Denis Leary, local chef crush #2 has a new sandwich spot on New Montgomery called the SENTINEL. You better not be picky, cuz there's only three or four things on the menu. That's trust. We had a turkey salad sando and a roast beef one too. The horseradish sauce was epic. The apricots in the turkey salad were unexpected and much appreciated. Like winning the lottery. Which is gonna happen to me any day now.

One more thing..."I Like Killing Flies"...the movie. A documentary about a foul-mouthed restaurant owner/cook who's been at it for 30 years. It's a familiar story about the struggle between old-school work ethic and neighborhood loyalty vs. rent hikes and gentrification. Kinda like the current beef between Ice T and Soulja Boy. Entertaining.

Be careful with the illegal fireworks!!!

IN MY BELLY

2008-04-20T16:17:00.000-07:00

1. Citrus Buttermilk Pudding Cake from Modern Tea in Hayes Valley. If you can't deal with the crowded, noisy, breaded-pork overload at Suppenkuche across the street, come here. Tea is comfort, and so is this creamy cake. It's served in a mason jar which ups the cute factor ante. Warning: you will not find Celestial Seasonings Sleepytime tea on the menu here.

2. Mascarpone grits with wild mushrooms at 1300 Fillmore.
I secretly wanted the whole appetizer portion to myself, but there were four of us so I was polite and only licked the bowl after everyone else was done.

3. Strawberries with Fromage Blanc. Similar to strawberries n' cream but tangier since fromage blanc is like a milder, fluffier cream cheese. I made it with Ella Bella strawberries and Cowgirl creamery cheese. Springtime is the right time to support your local farmers!

4. Back to Nature dill pickles. Crunchy, salty, non-vinegary...I can't stop thinking about them. I think I'm in love with a pickle! Fortunately this is not the kind of pickle affair that will be detrimental to my impending nuptials.

SAUSAGE ALERT

2008-04-01T20:53:00.000-07:00

MENDOCINO. Our secret spot. Deer, chipmunks, 'laxin in the hot tub, making fires, homemade chocolate chip banana bread...this is how we roll.

Me and the D took some time last weekend for reading, napping, eating, and the usual romancing that accompanies us wherever we go.
If you've never been to Mendo, (I'm pretty sure the locals never call it that), it's a postcard-perfect coastal town where everyone is an artist, fisherman, hippy or meth head, from what I can tell.
The population is approximately 2000, of which there are approximately 5 black people. Weird.
As for food, this time we tried the Mendocino Cafe. Simple and solid...D had an excellent gumbo, and I went for the pasta with cream sauce. There's nothing like a little butter, cream, cheese and carbs to soothe my hormonal unrest.
Spring Fashion Sidenote: our waiter was wearing a handcrafted beaded hemp necklace, artisanal silver rings, and a blousy shirt. Definitely a good sign. In Mendo, this type of personal statement seems right and true.
After inquiring about the extraordinary Andouille sausage in D's gumbo, our *I BRAKE FOR PEACE* waiter explained that it was made right up the street in Fort Bragg, population ~7000. We promptly made the 15 minute drive to discover an excess of public storage sites and one Roundman's Smokehouse. For a small town vigorously promoting the world of art glass wine stoppers, this was a major foodie find! We stocked up on turducken sausage, corned beef hash sausage, and bacon and jack sausage, all lovingly smoked on the premises and sold in their tiny but thoughtfully stocked specialty shop. We are moving to Mendo as soon as we can...in about 30 years, when we will have second and third homes all over the globe. Gotta go, the boss is coming!

TINY BUBBLES

2008-03-21T10:46:00.000-07:00

Not only is our mayor kinda handsome, he is singlehandedly trying to change the world one issue at a time!
Forget about gay marriage, the homeless problem, and crime in Hunters Point...now he's taking on bottled water. Finally!

Seriously though, this is a great idea. Just drink our delicious tap water and save the earth! It doesn't hurt to ask right?
I mean, this probably won't be THE thing that stops global warming and restores our planet to a pristine green paradise, but if you combine the increased tap water-drinking with driving a Prius...now you're on to something!

It's hopeless isn't it?
Well, if you can't live without fizzy water but still care about the environment, or just want a fun new gadget to play with in the kitchen, you can make your own agua con gas with a Soda Club Home Soda Maker .
Get your bubble on. That will probably be a new hip hop song by Soulja Boy Tell Em. He is so stupid.

IRISH MEAT

2008-03-18T09:48:00.000-07:00

While the rest of you were out there chugging green beer yesterday and throwing up in the bathroom of your local Irish pub, I was at home practicing wifey duties and making REUBENS!
I boiled up the meat on Sunday with the usual suspects (cabbage, potatoes) and a delicious horseradish sauce. Last night we had the sandos, and tonight I'm making a soup with the leftover cabbage. The Irish gift that keeps on giving. Just like my leprechaun fiance!

Just so you know that I'm keeping it real, I found an "all natural" corned beef at Whole Foods without any sodium nitrate. That's the stuff that makes it bright pink, but beef is supposed to be brown, duh.
And I used Bubbies sauerkraut which is just cabbage, salt and water. No vinegar, no soggy stringy stuff, and if you eat enough of it, you won't get scurvy because it has tons of vitamin C. I hate scurvy.
Pass the kraut!

FINGER LICKIN' GOOD

2008-03-14T11:42:00.000-07:00

SPORK. Not only is it a perfect metaphor for human existence, it's a really good restaurant right here in San Francisco.
It happens to be in the old Kentucky Fried Chicken building on Valencia Street, which makes sense of course - KFC being early pioneers of the spork-as-eating-utensil technology.

Let's see, despite any insecurities I may have had about the hipness factor (moderate) and misgivings about their "slow food in a fast food shell" philosophy, I was pleasantly surprised with the simple decor and simply delicious food.
We had the airiest dinner rolls to start off. They are $0 dollars, come sprinkled with sea salt and a side of whipped honey butter, and all you have to do is ask for them. They will bring more if you ask again. Still $0 dollars!
We also shared calamari with crispy brussel sprouts (yum), and housemade gnocchi with ricotta in a light tomato sauce (more please).
Both excellent and fresh, just like the cute--but too waifish for my taste--waiters.
For the main stuff, D had halibut, newly single Sara (holla) had scallops and I had the wild mushroom pasta. Mine was the only dish that was slightly off...the fresh pasta was lumped up and a little too greasy, but it was way better than a 12 Piece Original Recipe bucket combo for sure.
We had to try dessert given how smoothly things were going down the hatch, so we got beignets and an order of "Elvis has left the building." Yeah, dumb name but smart flavors...a homemade peanut butter cup with ice cream, caramel sauce, bananas and salty nuts. Peanuts! Hubba hubba.

Yours Truly, The Colonel

CUTTING THE CHEESE

2008-03-13T11:48:00.000-07:00

Have you been watching American Idol?
Don't lie, me too!
Just like expensive prostitutes and cheaper prices at the gas pump, it's what America wants! The cheesy performances, product placements, celebrity cross-promotional appearances, bad hairdos and teary "I-just-got-voted-off" montages...it's the perfect midweek guilty pleasure.

Speaking of cheese, here are two easy things you can do with a block of sharp cheddar:

1. Cheese crisps
Shred up some cheddar, make 2 inch-wide piles on a cookie sheet, and cook at 350 degrees for about 18 minutes. The cheese will flatten out and get super greasy just like your forehead on a hot summer's day, so don't forget to blot!
When they cool off, they are crispy and look sexy alongside a nice bowl of soup.

2. Cheese sauce (for broccoli or general food drowning, dipping and dunking). Melt 2tbsp butter, whisk in about 1tbsp flour and cook for a minute until thick. Whisk in milk until it gets thinner, then dump in shredded cheese until melted, adding more milk until you get the consistency you want. Toss in some salt, pepper, mustard powder or whatever else you like and sauce it up!

If you are lazy and love preservatives, you could always heat up some Tostito's Con Queso dip in the microwave instead. Talk about guilty pleasures!

RETURN OF THE MACK

2008-02-12T17:30:00.000-08:00

Spring has sprung. Cherry blossoms are popping off,
shirtless guys are once again roaming the Castro, and asparagus has reappeared at the Farmers Market. Hallelujah!
It was a long, cold, rainy winter.
I won't make excuses for not writing, but if I had to I might say:

I got engaged. Miracles do happen.

We got Rock Band. I am now pursuing a career in video game drumming.

The writer's strike.

I was tangled in Christmas lights and couldn't use my right hand.

The primaries. YES WE CAN.

My car got stolen. Kinda.

American Idol.

I was on a hunger strike.

Ok, that's not true and way out of line. I've been eating the same as I ever was and my current obsessions include:

1. Parsnips. I quarter them lengthwise, toss with olive oil and salt and roast away.

2. Elk roast. It's hard to find a good elk recipe these days, but we soaked our small roast in milk and various spices for a day, wrapped it in bacon and got busy! I hope you like your meat bloody, cuz it's best to eat elk rare. According to the Ontario Elk Breeder's society, it's real healthy too.

3. Vettori Prosecco. This is one of the few boozy items in existence that doesn't give me a screaming headache if I have more than one glass. Plus now that I'm gettin' married, I'm fancy! If you read Italian, let me know what the website says.

4. Pork chops with mustard sauce. I've made this recipe twice and I double the sauce. Fried pork is universal!

5. Madge's twice-baked potatoes. Sour cream, butter, cheese, repeat. Thanks mom!

That's it for now, but please send me your recipes, threats and slanderous name-calling encouragements and I will write more often.
Love,
Amateur cook and soon to be WIFEY!

YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST

2007-11-16T15:57:00.000-08:00

We've already established that I am *in the know* when it comes to the latest food trends and how to generally live the hip, happening, banging, popping, fresh, hyphy, dope, hella awesome food-loving existence that you all want to live.
Holler if you hear me!

Right, so it's no surprise that a topic I blogged about way back in January - LOCAVORES - is now getting national recognition. Locavore has just been named the Oxford Word of The Year! This is all very exciting and I am expecting my royalty check soon.

Also of note: cougar - a runner up word, and identity which I had previously explored (see: Heather's Urban Cougar Deluxe Birthday party sponsored by Miller Genuine Draft, at the cougar-in-training age of 32 - that is no lie). I have since given up this dark and shameful Mrs. Robinson lifestyle thanks to the D from Detroit!

Moving on, my Thanksgiving menu has been finalized and I will be gathering items over the next week, and geeking out about giblet vs. non-giblet gravy.

Two new recipes I'm excited about trying:
Roasted Brussel Sprouts with Cranberry Brown Butter
and
Bittersweet Chocolate Pecan Pie

You can come over if you want. Just let me know.

IN MY BELLY: INVENTORY

2007-11-07T20:41:00.000-08:00

Chronicling your eating habits is super trendy these days. Some people go all the way and write a book about it. Most nerds just have a blog.
In my journey to be the hippest, most behind-the-trend-curve food blogger out there, I want to tell you what I ate today.

Breakfast: Whole wheat sesame bagel with chive cream cheese. At around 10:23am, my breath was oniony and lactose and I needed a nap.

Snack: Dried plums and raw almonds. Don't be upset with me, I need the fiber.

Lunch: Chicken parmesean sandwich and potato salad. I peeled off most of the congealed cheese, but enjoyed every bit of mayonnaise in the salad.

Snack: Mini Snickers with almonds. It's leftover from Halloween, I know it's not organic. No regrets.

Dinner: Eggplant, cauliflower and green bean stir fry with red chili paste and basmati rice. More healthy. It all evens out in the end.

Do you feel like you know me better now? I'm bored and feel violated and vulnerable.
Dog the Bounty Hunter is on Larry King...gotta go!

CHICAGO is TOTALLY AWESOME

2007-11-05T14:08:00.000-08:00

Next time you find yourself wandering the streets of Chicago, cold and naked, looking for a jacket or just a nice place to warm your buns, you should check out Michael and Louise's Hopleaf Bar. They probably won't let you in if you really are naked, so put some pants on already!

My friend Natalie from North Carolina (go Tarheels!), recommended this place, so I can't take credit for the discovery, but I can tell you that it was AWESOME. Awesome if you love Belgian beer. Awesome if you love mussels and frites and large plates of meaty food. Awesome if you love cigarette smoke wafting in from the front room bar.
Yeah, I don't love that one either, but some people might. Hi Mom!
Their extensive beer menu - focused mainly on Belgian beers but also hitting up a couple other countries - was THIRTEEN pages long.
Burrrrp.

We also got to check out the new party spot and kitchen studio from the Food Network's Hearty Boys. SWALLOW! You're on HBTV! That's their slogan, I'm just reporting the facts.

Stop laughing at their picture.

Damian's sister Liz rented out the spot, her pastry chef boyfriend made a crazy coffin birthday cake with layers of pumpkin bread, mocha buttercream and chocolate ganache, and there were fancy party snacks like polenta with escargot; and pizza with eggplant, feta and chocolate. All low fat and approved by Jenny Craig and Curves.

Other things about Chicago approved by me: lots of pretty brick buildings; wide streets with fallen leaves;
and really long mani/pedis.
We're talking two hours of cuticle trimming, foot soaking and pumice scrubbing. I had a chance to "read" every Us, People and Star magazine and am now fully caught up on all the breaking celebrity news, like the grueling Spice Girls reunion tour schedule, and what type of burrito Drew Barrymore eats when she's depressed. Thank you Chicago!

The Ghost of Rocktober

2007-11-04T18:36:00.000-08:00

Life is whizzing by uncontrollably fast lately. I find myself wanting to go on more vacations and pondering early retirement. All I need to do is win the lottery, that much I have figured out.
Here it is another new month, my friends are all getting married and having babies and I can't even find time to write about everything I've seen, eaten, and seen eaten out in the eating scene.

There were highlights, like the whole lamb roasting on a spit at Dave and Sara's wedding; and the million layer cake at Aaron and Kate's wedding. The cake was from Dianda's Italian American Pastry in the Mission and basically tasted like the best creamhorn you've ever had, over and over again. If you've never had a creamhorn and don't even know what a creamhorn is, well shame on you! It was so good, we ordered it two weeks later for Damian's 35th birthday get together.

There were also some dining disappointments along the way, like the overpriced, overstylized, overhyped Farina, which is apparently Ligurian-style Italian food. I'm not sure about this since I've never been to Italy, but the sommelier was rocking a see-through white shirt with a gold chain, so that was pretty authentic I guess. Their website didn't work when I tried it either. Those jerks.

Oh yeah, then there was Two. Used to be Hawthorne Lane, now it's just Hawthorne LAME. Our waitress didn't know her ass from her elbow, let alone the drink or food menus. The best thing about this place were the mini chive biscuits, and even they could've used a little butter. Another sad case of style over substance.

Best thing I made last month-maybe ever-was the Mexican Shredded Beef with Red Chilis. Praise Jah! Dios Mio!
For something so delicious, it wasn't even that hard to make! Kinda like Rice Krispie Treats. Sort of but not really.

If you're ever looking for a sure thing and you aren't into hookers, one of my all-time favorite recipes is Mario Batali's Stuffed Figs with Prosciutto. It's pretty easy to make, if you don't mind stuffing your fingers and stinky cheese into a squishy fig hole. Dirty!

More soon about Chicago and what I'm making for dinner. But just in case, Happy Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years!

IN MY BELLY - condensed version

2007-10-05T14:12:00.000-07:00

1. Kara's Cupcakes - brought these to a dinner party the other night and they were a big hit. The frosting was pure butter, sometimes with Madagascar bourbon vanilla or coconut cream cheese. Isn't animal fat great?

2. Eggplant meatballs at Bar Bambino -
I know MEATballs are typically made of meat, but these polpette di melanzane are special. You can share them with your vegetarian friends and have the rabbit pappardelle all to yourself!
Good to know: the neighborhood "parking attendants" won't pee on your car if you give them a dollar.

That's it for now. Say a prayer for Britney.

Famine to Feast

2007-10-04T18:32:00.000-07:00

My sad dining habits the last couple of weeks can be summed up in haiku form:
Egg salad, corn dogs,
The new Whole Foods is real big.
Thank God for takeout.

Poet laureate I am not. But the food nerd was out in full force last weekend with D's sister and her new beau in town, and we committed some serious gluttonous crimes.
It started at The Slanted Door on Friday night, where the food was good, better than average maybe, but still a bit much of a scene for my taste. Which lately has not been very sophisticated (see haiku), so what do I know.

We had ono from the raw bar (favorite of the night), a lobster salad (short on lobster, heavy on cucumber), lamb rack (slightly overcooked but I still gnawed at the bone like Fred Flinstone), beef bavette (meat was good, potatoes were undercooked), halibut (what's my name?) and a side of broccolini. My ginger limeade cocktail was excellent. The traditional Vietnamese rice porridge dessert was a little less excellent.

A tour of my second home-the Farmers' Market-on Saturday morning, and subsequent picnic in the Botanical Gardens, was a perfect warmup for our dinner at Foreign Cinema that night.
I am still confused by the cocoa nibs on my heirloom tomato salad, but the Kumamoto and Miyagi oysters were excellent. We also had mussels, quail, steak, risotto, strawberry crepes and chocolate cake with Amarena cherries, which I want to eat a lot more of before I die.
After all this hobnobbing and high rolling, we couldn't just spend Sunday night in our jammies watching the Rock of Love season finale on Vh1...(thank goodness for reruns!)
D surprised me with tix to the Sunday Supper fundraiser for CUESA (the fine folks who organize and orchestrate the Ferry Plaza Farmers Market). This event was like a porn convention for foodies. Jenna Jameson wasn't there, but Chris Cosentino was. The Iron Chef guy served me up a mini lamb sandwich! I'm just sayin.
Local chefs (about 30 of 'em), artisanal appetizers, wine, giveaways, special Hangar One cocktails, and that was just the reception! For the dinner part, we sat at communal tables, chatted with strangers and celebrated the farmers, chefs and Bay Area dining in general. Our dinner was a surprise, and fortunately it didn't involve egg salad or corn dogs! We got an olive oil and citrus poached tuna and black rice salad; then came a Tuscan pork roast with shelling beans; a cheese course (all local); and dessert was a ginger apple tartlet with warm caramel.

No matter how full I got, I refused to stop eating. Three cheers for stylish baggy dresses!
It was a perfect weekend with my two true loves.

New Favorite Spot

2007-09-07T21:04:00.000-07:00

My typical corner store experience usually involves buying a pack of gum, bottle of water, lottery tickets or the newspaper.
The floors are often a bit filthy and sometimes there's a guy at the counter paying for a fifth of 5 O'Clock vodka with nickels. Nothing memorable.

Enter Healthy Spirits at 15th and Castro, "A Corner Store With Personality" so says their business card and their MySpace page. How many corner stores do you know that have a business card AND a MySpace page?? Exactly.
I'd been hearing about this place from some folks in the know, and sure enough upon entering the store, I was greeted by a guy in a chef's hat fashioning delicious artisan cheese plates for all to sample!
Apparently they make some of their own cheeses there, including a Middle Eastern one called labani, which is stored in olive oil and creamy like cream cheese only a little milder. The corner store chef guy served it with cherry tomatoes and fresh mint...and kept pulling out other cheeses that we "had to try." I wanted to stay there all night.
Oh, did I mention they have the largest selection of Belgian beers in San Francisco? It goes so far beyond Chimay and La Chouffe that I bet all of your Belgian friends (do you even have any?) won't even know about half the stuff.

Yeah, and they have Friday night Rami's Mommy dinners which you can reserve for $10...Rami being the store owner, and his mom being the one who makes all the Middle Eastern delectables.

Instead of novelty underwear shaped liked roses on the store counter, you can get a little tub of homemade zatar or a locally made Charles Chocolates bar. Now that's classy.

THE DIRTY SOUTH

2007-09-06T19:03:00.000-07:00

Dear Lord. Me and D packed up and headed to Pensacola to see my parents (and their seven cats) over Labor Day weekend. What we ate there in four days was an impressive study in intestinal abuse, and I haven't recovered yet.
We were starving after our three hour delay at the Dallas airport, where I reluctantly chose Pizza Hut
over the Hot Dog Construction Company. I made the most of it as you can see.
Madge and Yvon (mom and dad) greeted us with a lukewarm Steak 'n Shake sandwich wrapped in napkins and I let D eat most of it, deciding to wait for the Krispy Kremes back at the house.

One of the best things about the South (besides a church on every corner, chewin' tobacco and missing teeth), is that you can be driving along in almost any town, and all of a sudden, out of your wildest pork fantasy, there's a guy on the side of the road with a smoker and some folding chairs, selling pulled pork sandwiches. This is no joke.
You have to pull over and get one, or several. It is one of the purest eating pleasures I have experienced. No reservation necessary.

That same night, dad grilled steaks and mom made her famous twice-baked, double-stuffed potatoes,
then they taught us how to play Mexican Train Dominoes. I'm not making that up. It's a real game.
We are now obsessed with both, but can play the dominoes every night and still fit into our pants.

This is where the details start to get fuzzy. Sausage, bacon, french toast, Pillsbury Cinnamon rolls, english muffins and fried eggs for breakfast? How do they stay so thin?
Is it the heat or the humidity?

You just can't get a good bucket o' seafood around the Bay Area, but you sure can in the South...at Rick's Crab Trap.

The high school drop-out service was weak, but the sweet tea made up for that in sugar content and the huge half gallon plastic cup it's served in. The bucket comes filled with clams, oysters, mussels, shrimp, crab, crawfish, corn, potatoes and broccoli. Hush puppies and clarified garlic butter on the side for dipping. It's a fun mess.

And that was our culinary tour of the greater Pensacola area, where Waffle Houses outnumber Starbucks by 6 to 1, "God answers knee mail" according to one church sign, and soda is always on sale. Go Gators!

NICE MELONS

2007-08-09T18:06:00.000-07:00

For those hot summer nights when you don't feel like cooking...or in my case, I want to pretend it's a hot summer night but I'm really wearing a sweater and thick socks...try this salad!
It's just watermelon, thinly sliced red onions, feta cheese (the saltier the better) and arugula. Toss it together with your version of a homemade white wine vinaigrette and red pepper flakes and you're done. Definitely use seedless watermelon or you'll be spitting everywhere and that's just not ladylike. It is fun though.

THE CLASSICS

2007-08-01T17:03:00.000-07:00

Remember when the Smashing Pumpkins were good? It was the grunge-era early nineties, I finally realized permed hair wasn't cool, beer bongs ruled and so did the Pumpkins.The last time I saw them play live was Lollapalooza 1994, right after graduating from college. I was drunk on warm beer, the music festival vibe and how much money that English Literature degree was gonna fetch me.
Well, things certainly have changed! I don't write bad poetry anymore, nor have I gotten rich off my first published novel (which isn't written yet), and the Smashing Pumpkins kinda suck now.
D and I decided to check out one of ELEVEN sold out shows at the Fillmore Monday night, and we ended up leaving after 5 songs! Maybe we're just old, or maybe funny guitar noises just don't impress us anymore.

At any rate, there was a positive food experience to be had despite the crushing of our Siamese Dreams nostalgia.
FLORIO is a French/Italian brasserie right up on Fillmore Street, and I always forget how much I like this place. Despite its Pacific Heights location, it's unpretentious for the most part. A lot of locals frequent Florio, but it's an older crowd, not like the see-and-be-seen types across the street at the Grove. The atmosphere is cozy with a manageable decibel level and just the right amount of background music. Service is great in a friendly, knowledgeable old school way, and the food always seems like it's been carefully bathed in butter and oils. Yum.
Florio has gotten quite a few negative reviews on Yelp, but you can make up your own mind can't you? You don't need some smalltime food blogger to tell you what to do and where to go! I mean...
The complaints mostly mentioned not enough of a young, hip crowd and small portions. Hey, people...you don't need a party platter trough of food every time you eat! I'm just sayin.
D had a perfectly crisp-on-the-outside piece of halibut, with potatoes drenched in pesto. He said it was the best fish dish he's ever had. I had a simple summer pasta with heirloom tomatoes, basil and garlic. Sounds boring, but delicious doesn't always have to be complex.
We also started with a special menu item - fresh garbanzo beans that were flash-fried and heavily salted. We agreed that we were in love. With each other and the beans!

Summer Lovin' II, The Burbs

2007-07-31T18:26:00.000-07:00

This weekend me and the D took a field trip to the Oakland suburbs for a grilled meat orgy with my friend Brad, his wife Stacy, kids Mailey (3 yrs) and Addison (8 months), and one dog named Cheddar.
I have major respect for the whole family thing and find it amazing that parents can still form complete sentences and eat real meals not involving Cheerios or Goldfish, what with all the high-volume and high-energy squealing, flailing, dancing and crying going on. Thank God I brought my famous Betty Crocker cupcakes, as the excited children (there were two other guests) kept busy for at least an hour with the Cupcake Treasure Hunt, while the adults ate dinner.
Now back to the orgy. Since D is new to the whole grilling business, Brad wanted to show him the meat ropes so to speak, and D was attentive as Brad lovingly demonstrated his wet and dry meat rub techniques, and how to give sausages a proper beer bath. Oh!
Not only did Brad grill up beer-soaked sausages, and skirt steak for carne asada tacos, he also made the rarely seen pork triple play; a pork loin, stuffed with chorizo and wrapped in bacon. Oink.
I played my part in this flesh-eating bonanza, with the extra special baked beans I made. Say what you will about the epicurean low rung occupied by the humble baked bean, I'm from the East Coast where beans 'n' franks were a weeknight staple. Thanks Mom! Not for the impatient, my recipe involved soaking the beans (white Northerns) overnight, frying up bacon and onions, making the baked bean sludge from scratch (email me for the recipe), and baking it all for about 4 hours. I think Brad and D both had three helpings.
After all the food-consuming, dog-petting and baby-holding, me and D sat tired on the couch while the real adults danced and sang to the Ramones with their kids. Parenting is punk rock!

SUMMER LOVIN'

2007-07-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

Oh hi. It's summer and I'm sorry things have been quiet here on the Meatball, but I've been busy. I'm just sayin.
There's been canoeing on the Russian River, Saturday night cribbage, volunteering at the Farmers Market, the YouTube debate, coyote attacks, tennis, frisbee and our new barbecue!

I've been enjoying lots of juicy and delicious summer type things...
My top five:
1. Peaches
2. Dapple Dandy plums
3. Cherokee purple tomatoes
4. Corn on the cob
5. Yellow wax beans

Besides eating and galavanting around doing summery things, I've been reading this awesome book called The Scavenger's Guide to Haute Cuisine. This is how a real man eats! Hunting and killing and gutting and all kinds of gory stuff. I mean, it's cool in a Man vs. Wild kinda way. At least this guy knows where his food is coming from. Vegetarians and PETA beware.

Also, in the bathroom, as a quick reference guide for those emergency dinner parties I plan on the toilet, we have Schott's Food & Drink Miscellany.
This is a bunch of mostly irrelevant knowledge, history and terms from the culinary world, past and present. I've learned about the different types of slaves at a Roman dinner party; why asparagus makes your pee smell, and that "sniffing the barmaid's apron" refers to being drunk. Useless trivia nerd alert!

I made some arugula and basil pesto recently (no recipe) and it turned out pretty good! You can just follow a basic basil recipe but use half arugula or whatever ratio you want. And even though I'm still working out the kinks with the whole baking thing, it was pretty hard to mess up with my mom's muffin recipe and fresh summer blueberries. Pass the butter!

Pigging Out at the Fair

2007-07-05T19:00:00.000-07:00

Ah...the Marin County Fair. Where else can you find sheep dog trials, the Parade of Casseroles, Hambone Express pig racing, and blasts-from-the-past like KC and the Sunshine Band and the Village People?
D and I treated ourselves to a day of family fun last Sunday and it was just like old times. Although surrounded by the picturesque hills of Marin, it felt slightly less authentic than the North Carolina fair I experienced as a teenager, shotgunning Busch Light beers in the dusty parking lot before meeting up with delinquent friends to stuff ourselves silly and possibly throw up.

Despite the absence of country music, church-sponsored barbecue tents, and deep-fried candy bars, there was Hamburger Palace, Hot Dog Stick and the usual unnatural and indigestion-friendly foods. We managed to eat corn on the cob (dipped in a 5-gallon butter bucket), pepperoni pizza, an italian sausage sandwich, a tri-tip sandwich, garlic fries and a funnel cake. Oof. Pepto Bismol for the rest of the night, and our fair nostalgia satisfied until next year...

Breakfast on the Farm - Nicaragua Style

2007-07-02T15:41:00.000-07:00

It's taken me two weeks to accept that I'm not on vacation in Nicaragua anymore, and get around to writing about my favorite food experience there.
See, my breakfast routine usually consists of hot water, instant oatmeal sludge and a flourescent-lit office with no windows. Pity party I know. So, I was pretty excited when I heard about the Breakfast on the Farm tour during our recent stay at Morgan's Rock in Nicaragua.
We got to milk a cow, and immediately drink it in our coffee. Fresh. D was especially interested in the cow teats.
We picked our own eggs and ate them with the homemade tortillas we just made and gallo pinto, a typical Nicaraguan rice and beans dish. All of that with fresh salsa, and my favorite new cheese called cuajada which was dry, crumbly and intensely flavored, since it was smoked for two days in a nifty smoker right there in the back yard.
Then there was the stove. A beautiful wood-burning, hunk of metal. Simple and efficient. A piece of art. Sure, it was hot as hell standing over that open flame in 90 degree heat, but you can't just microwave a made-from-scratch tortilla now can you?
Breakfast may never be the same.

IN MY BELLY

2007-06-28T14:30:00.000-07:00

D and I just treated ourselves to an "IT'S ALMOST THE WEEKEND" lunch at Coco500 near my work on Brannan.
Some highlights:
1. Strawberry lemonade. Sweet summer! The bartender muddled some super ripe strawberries and ice in a glass, and had just made the lemonade this morning with cane sugar syrup and lemons. She told us exactly how to make it, and gave us some popsicle-making tips too. No Country Time lemonade here! Which of course is special in it's own right - like when you're driving through Tennessee in August, and you stop at the Piggly Wiggly for some pork skins and a sickly sweet refreshing beverage. Holler. You can take the girl outta the South, but you can't take the South...well, you get the idea.
2. Shaved wild mushroom salad with fresh herbs, avocado and manchego. Enough said.
3. Ricotta ravioli with mint, peas and ham. The ham was from this San Rafael company called Hobbs. It was chunky and looked like real pig muscle, not all weird and pressed like the stuff at Subway. Hey, sometimes you need a little more than the $2.99 six-inch special for lunch. I'm just sayin...

LOCAL LOVE - THE ALEMBIC

2007-06-22T13:30:00.000-07:00

Me and Sara had a little date the other night. No boys in honor of Gay Pride, and pretty much just cuz.
Disclaimer: We may have been sharing a common affliction known as PMS, and needed to have a bitchfest about how insensitive men can be, how unappreciated we are, and how bloated we felt. It happens.
She put on her red skirt, a little eyeliner and those big chola hoop earrings just to impress me. Cute.
I had been reading about this newish spot called the Alembic on Haight (between Cole and Schrader) and thought we'd go check it out. Mind you, I don't normally trek to Haight street for anything other than hash pipes, Halloween costumes and the latest bondage footwear, but I heard the Alembic locally sources most of their food, so it was sounding like my kinda place.
I guess they're mostly known for their "spirits" and the Magnolia beer brewed right there on hippy dippy Haight and Masonic. The liquor menu was in fact extensively impressive. Since I'm mostly drinking Arnold Palmers these days, I have lost touch with the many foreign and domestic methods with which to get David Hasselhoff plastered.
I managed to have one cocktail and not lose my cool thanks to all the delicious small plates we shared. There was a devilled duck egg, which seemed a lot like a regular devilled egg only a little fancier than what you get at the local church's fundraiser picnic. We also had mussels with andouille; ginger turmeric mushrooms; Moroccan lamb burgers (slider-sized), and herbed gnocchi with serrano ham and arugula pesto. YUM and YUMMY. The only negative thing I can summon is that the gnocchi were slightly "doughy" tasting, but everything else was otherwise pretty sublime...especially the dessert. Yes we had room in our bloated PMS bellies, the plates were SMALL I said!
Anyway, it was an almond raspberry coffee cake, warm and moist and topped with creme fraiche. Just what we needed to cure all of our worries and send us off into the first night of summer. Girl power.

SEDUCED - New Spot Alert!

2007-05-23T13:59:00.000-07:00

When you're out replenishing your crack supply at 6th and Mission, or jamming with the boombox guy who's dressed like a soldier, circa Michael Jackson's Thriller video, did you ever think you could simultaneously get some healthy, delicious, seasonal food while you're at it?
Well Split Pea Seduction thought about it, and you must go here now!
I wouldn't steer you wrong.
They're open for breakfast and lunch only, featuring savory and sweet crostatas, salads and soups. The menu changes daily according to the creative whims of the kitchen and whatever Mother Nature is kicking down that week. All of their packaging is compostable too.
Al Gore, take note.
Right now, I am eating a dandelion greens, strawberry, and mixed nut salad with a little queso thrown in for good measure. We're not talking the Planters can of mixed nuts that your Aunt Denise puts out for company either.
Oh yeah, the lentil and snap pea soup was really good too. It's comfort food, and it's healthy. Well, the crostata pastry probably isn't gonna reduce the cellulite on your thighs, but it's better than a Big Mac!
Last week I had a fava bean, arugula and asparagus salad with shaved Pecorino, and a fennel and wild mushroom crostata...all washed down with an old school Crush Grape soda. I'm telling you...check it out! They've only been open about a month, and they deserve some love. I can escort you there if you're scared.

WE BELIEVE

2007-05-14T09:27:00.000-07:00

I made this for dessert last night...so easy! Cut up some strawberries (I got three pints at the Farmers' Market they looked so good), melt some high quality bittersweet chocolate with a little heavy whipping cream, and sprinkle 'em with a little powdered sugar at the end! It's not rocket science, just try it!
The Warriors HAVE to win tonight, so get a bucket of KFC, some Hooters wings or whatever you need to do, and send out the MOJO!!! (if you don't like basketball, suck it up and just look at the strawberries again)
Love, H

Dear Mumsy

2007-05-13T20:16:00.000-07:00

My mom isn't a food freak like me. She doesn't make her salad dressing from scratch, or pay $16 for a bottle of organic olive oil.
That isn't to say she doesn't love food. She planted the seed in me, and I've just developed it into a flourishing case of food obsession and snobbery. I still share though, and the older I get, the more I appreciate the instilled traditions and the sense of food community she created (like sharing all that monstrous overgrown zucchini from the garden with unsuspecting neighbors!)

Seriously, we always had three meals a day, and we always ate as a family. Now, when I was the supercool age of thirteen, smoking Newport Lights and wearing A LOT of eyeshadow, I didn't think the family dinners were so great, but looking back, I'm nostalgic about the routine of having to "set the table and pour the milk" every night.

I appreciate the vegetables from her garden we had all summer long, especially the tomatoes, which I'd have with toast and cheese as a tv-time snack, or sprinkled with pepper alongside a plate of cottage cheese.
I appreciate the Sara Lee Pecan Coffee Cake we had every Christmas morning, and the week she spent making labor-intensive Christmas cookies, like powdered-sugar shortbreads, thumbprints and mini "pie" cookies filled with jam and nuts.
I appreciate the breakfast-for-dinner dinners, and the "pick plate" dinners, which were artfully assembled kaleidoscopes of the week's refurbished leftovers.
I appreciate the afterschool triscuits and cheese snacks, and the "secret" have-a-nice-day-i-love-you notes written on the napkin in my bag lunches. How many moms do you know who were that corny? In a good way I mean!

She taught me how to make banana bread, garlic mashed potatoes, and linguine with white clam sauce; and when I was a little training-wheels shortie, she'd let me stir up old cereal, ketchup, soda and whatever kitchen items I could reach, in a big pot so I could "cook" too.

Even though she says I'm the better cook now, she can still tear it up in the kitchen, so THANKS MOM for teaching me about the important stuff and making everything taste better.

IT'S OFFICIAL

2007-05-12T22:27:00.000-07:00

QUINCE IS THE BEST RESTAURANT IN SAN FRANCISCO. I mean it! I had my 35th birthday dinner there Thursday night, and even though I've rehashed the details ad nauseum with many people, including the cashier at Walgreens, I need to go over it one more time ok?
Quince is my kind of place. The chef, Michael Tusk used to work with Alice Waters of Chez Panisse, so he only uses the finest, most special ingredients, like Valentino Felicetti spaghetti, fiddlehead ferns, and Laughing Stock Farm pork. I know, I know, it's not stuff you can find at Safeway, so you should just go to Quince to get it.
If it were possible to taste LOVE in food, this is where you could do it. I can't count how many times D and I said throughout the meal "this is THE BEST thing I've ever had."
We stuffed ourselves early with an oxtail, horseradish and beet appetizer; pasta with morel and fava bean sauce; and another pasta filled with veal, pork and rabbit. Pure heaven. They had types of pasta I've never even heard of, like paccheri and agnolotti, and each one is uniquely delicious, perfectly cooked and surprisingly light. The presentations aren't complicated or showy, and it's irrelevant anyway, because the food is so amazing. Did I mention they even had a special menu printed just for us? Yeah! Between my surprise party posters the previous night, and now this, I was starting to feel like an aging (but important) rock star.

Speaking of stars, James Spader was eating there too! Not because it was my birthday of course, but it was fun secretly staring and trying to name movies he's been in, while we stuffed ourselves silly.
Back to the food! Have you ever had a meatball pillow? Me neither, until now. I've discussed and analyzed the importance of meatballs in this blog before, but never again...I've seen the light, and now above all, I worship this ethereal orb of meaty achievement. Forever and ever amen. Three of them on a plate with buttered potatoes and wild arugula...it sounds so simple, but I get misty-eyed just thinking about it. The Watson Farm spring lamb was no joke either. I think I'm just running out of words to describe how joyous the experience was.
Time for dessert, and we only had room for the fresh strawberries in vanilla sauce, with pound cake croutons and spun sugar. Pound cake croutons?! Why didn't I think of that?
So there ya have it...the best birthday dinner ever. Even better than my eleventh birthday at Chuck E. Cheese, gorging on cheap pizza and playing Ms. PacMan until way past my bedtime. It's good to be all grown up!

35 ALIVE

2007-05-11T11:09:00.000-07:00

I'm officially in my "mid-thirties" folks. I know, it's a doozy, it's a "big one", there's no going back now, and it's been AWESOME so far.
I've had some spectacular birthdays the last few years - rooftops in London; oysters and bacon around the campfire in Point Reyes; strip clubs (I was much younger!) - but D, my MAN OF THE YEAR, has trumped everything with the mouth-gaping, heart-clutching SURPRISE party he orchestrated on Wednesday night. I can't believe I didn't even catch a whiff of the details...here I was thinking he was having an affair with a younger woman, all the working late, secretive text messaging and whatnot...so who's the 35-year old windbag jerk now? Guilty as charged.
He even got fancypants birthday desserts!
D knows his lady, and the uppercrust crowd she rolls with. Ok, uppercrust might be a stretch, but the spread was impressive and the lovely crowd that showed up on a foggy Wednesday night...we're talking QUALITY friends right there. Thank you to everyone.

So, there were gingerbread and cream cheese cupcakes from Miette, my favorite organically wallet-busting cake boutique.
Alex must have thought my boob was a cupcake. Oopsie!
Then there were the gold-flaked, death-by-chocolate cakes from Citizen Cake. And who can forget the balsamic strawberry ice cream pie from Bi-Rite Creamery! We needed a lot of surface area for all the candles. Jeez.
D even designed a Russian propaganda invitation poster with my grill on it!

Please print and distribute as you see fit. Thanks to my sweet and tricky master of birthday ceremonies. I am one lucky ex-cougar. Stay tuned for details of my best birthday dinner ever. Hooray for 35!

THE DROUGHT IS OVER

2007-04-30T14:38:00.000-07:00

Here I am! Back by popular demand. Well, a few of you actually seem to miss my irreverent food ravings, and that kinda makes me feel all nice for a minute, and then guilty for not putting out enough.
Sorry. I'm getting older, I'm usually in bed by 10:30, and I was starving myself until Sanjaya got voted off American Idol, so what can I say. Then there's the vacation planning, NBA playoffs, the freeway caving in, Sopranos on Sunday, and my 35th birthday coming up (reservations at Quince!)...so it's always something keeping me away.

All excuses aside for now, Aaron and Kate cooked up a fine GO WARRIORS meal Sunday night (epicures can also be basketball fans thankyouverymuch), and after dinner we screamed and high-fived our way to sweet victory. Chips, dips, grilled meats, Kate's colon-cleansing cabbage salad,
brownies, macaroons, and I'm still full today. Aaron's slam dunk barbecued ribs were sending off some game-winning mojo. Damn those reeyubs were GOOD. Finger lickin and how. Yan can cook, and so can Aaron. Thanks guys! There they are right there, the cute couple.10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_2Vna1ltULNs/RjbDH9_15XI/AAAAAAAAAPY/MOGEw7Fvl_U/s200/775430774403_0_BG.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5059445773066167666" />

See, Aaron was supposed to write my first official guest blog about Nicaraguan food, but since he didn't, I'll just have to write my own after I go there in June! I'm just practicing my Spanish now. Bueno.

Oh yeah, two things I've been loving in my belly lately:
Fra'Mani salumi. Everybody knows I'm a cheerleader for Italian meats, and this stuff is old-fashioned hog-handling at it's finest. Paul Bertolli, who's a famous local chef, started the company about a year ago and it's probably the best dry salami you'll ever taste. Unless you find some old grandpa in Italy who's making it, so just let me know.

For the veg-friendly folks, there's SOYRIZO!. I can't eat salami all the time - gotta look after my aging buns y'know - and this stuff tastes almost like the real Mexican chorizo deal, only with way less grease and indigestion. It's another California company called El Burrito, and I get it at Whole Foods. Just try it. Your heart and stomach will thank you. Muey Bueno! (Spanish for Beginners...watch out Nicaragua!)

EASTER PEEPS

2007-04-10T17:44:00.000-07:00

I was gonna make a Coca Cola Ham for Easter this year to celebrate the mysterious redneck history of baby Jesus, but thankfully Alex and Kelton invited us over for an authentic Easter dinner featuring slaughtered baby lamb instead!!
Thanks to Alex, our friendly neighborhood vegetarian, for keeping memories of past sacrificial offerings to the carnvirous cause alive during this somber celebration.
There she is serving up her own, meatless, kosher, ayurvedic, non-comedogenic, yoga-toned plate. The mashed taters and garlic-roasted asparagus were fit for religious royalty. Praise be to the Newborn King and Queen Latifah. This is what the rest of our plates looked like.
Thank you Easter Bunny! Despite his sour stomach and lingering hangover, Kelton was a whiz cooking up the meats and used his patented meat-tenting technique that kept our chops moist and made the ladies swoon. I think I even caught D giving him the once over?

All I had to do was bring the dessert, so my foolproof Duncan Hines/Betty Crocker combo-in the form of a double layer cake-came through once again. I am a one trick pony.
Alas, our prayer-filled festivities had to end, so I ceremoniously performed the one-time-only "Fiesta con Bailes de Algodon Gazapo" or Dance of the Cotton Bunny. The complicated level of choreography could not be adequately captured on film. The Holy Spirit lives within! Amen.

IN MY BELLY - EXTENDED EASTER REMIX

2007-03-27T16:30:00.000-07:00

1. My cucumber guy has returned to the Farmers' Market! This is big news in the cucumber world. They are Mediterranean-style, and really crunchy not spongy like the big waxy supermarket ones. At about 4-6 inches usually, they are also perfect for handheld snacking (insert tasteless joke here).

2. Soy ice cream. I know it's unorthodox, some might even say weird, but the Very Cherry Chocolate Chip from Double Rainbow is the best fake ice cream orgasm I've ever had. It's less-fattening and all that, but most importantly for me, causes less gas! Excellent cherry:chocolate:ice cream ratios.

3. This was a while back when mom was in town, but I can't forget the Oysters Casino we had at Hog Island. Oyster + butter + bacon + paprika served hot and bubbly. I could've eaten at least 3 dozen easy. If I was rich! They ain't cheap, so enjoy every drop of buttery oyster bacon juice you can. Lick the shell even!

4. BI-RITE CREAMERY'S SALTED CARAMEL ICE CREAM. ALL-CAPS cuz that's how good it is. If you'll remember from #2 above, ice cream usually makes my stomach a little unpleasant, but this ice cream is so mind-blowing, I'm willing to throw caution to the wind (I've got a whole box of Lactaid pills). I forgot I was eating ice cream, it was so much like homemade buttery caramel. Small batch, artisanal...just how I like it.

5. I made curried beef with broccoli for dinner a few weeks ago. It's not rocket science I know, but it was pretty healthy and pretty delicious (see recipe). And just pretty. I didn't microwave the broccoli like the recipe says, but you can do what you want if you're really into nuking stuff.

6. Maverick. The restaurant not the surf competition...I can't even swim barely! This place is definitely in my current (and probably forever) top 3 rotation. Me and D go for brunch, he usually gets the smoked duck hash and I usually get the Texan Migas scramble, strawberry lemonade (homemade of course), and cheesy grits on the side. Hallelujah hollaback! Dinner is no joke either. Don't leave valuables in your car if you drive. I'm just sayin.

St. Patty's Schnitzel Soul Train

2007-03-18T11:57:00.000-07:00

I meant to finish this entry last weekend, in honor of St. Patrick and our love for all things Irish. The short story is that me and D went bowling and ate German food in Alameda on Saturday night with some friends. Not your traditional corned beef and cabbage, green beer pukefest, but I'm not 22 anymore, and we did wear these festively flattering leprechaun hats Damian's mom had sent us (just long enough for the picture), so it all worked out.

It started off innocently enough at Speisekammer, a pretty decent German restaurant in Alameda, but not quite up to par with Suppenkuche, here in SF. The potato pancakes were excellent, nice and crispy, and my Jagerschnitzel (pork cutlet with mushroom sauce) gave me the special energy I was gonna need to showcase my bowling prowess at the alley. My entree came with some kind of pickled beet, carrot and cabbage side salad, which was tasty enough but mostly irrelevant with that big plate of sauced-up pork and spaetzel in front of me. There was an excellent-sounding band called the Frisky Frolics playing in the front room, featuring such classic German instruments as the ukelele, kazoo and clarinet. Anyway, it sounded good and added to the lively German beer hall vibe.

But we had bigger schweinebraten to fry up the street at the AMF bowling alley where we learned how the players in Alameda thug it up on Saturday night at Xtreme Bowl. Seriously. I might try and "talk hip hop" every now and then for dramatic effect here in my tiny blogosphere, but our bowling adventure in Alameda was the real deal. The rizzle dizzle. The music was an urban retrospective of great bowling jams from Tyrese to Tupac, Mary J to Mobb Deep. Who knew that the ten-pin tango was bigger than my white bread history of league-bowling uncles and aunts?? I felt like I was in a hip hop video, and we were the token funny white people. Definitely the minority, but once we got all fixed up with two lanes, and our very own "lane attendant" named Lakeesha, we lost ourselves in the bass-thumping urban vibe and D ended up flamboasting with a very respectable high score of 158 for the night. Erin go bragh!

TWO WOMEN IN TWO NIGHTS

2007-03-04T19:41:00.000-08:00

D was out of town this past weekend celebrating his dad's 70th birthday (Happy Birthday Hugh!), and I was a little terrified at the thought of sleeping at the Congo by myself, what with extended families of ferocious and odiferous creatures running around in our backyard. So I decided to have some good old-fashioned sleepovers, and spend some quality time with my girls Alex and Sara. Maybe it's a little unorthodox to have sleepovers when you're almost 35, but that's how I roll, and the ladies were down, their respective husband and boyfriend all atwitter with perverted images of us pillow fighting and running around the house in our skivvies. Men.
Anyway, Friday night Alex and I went to Dosa, the South Indian place on Valencia. This place has been heavily hyped since it opened last year, and it still gets really crowded, so we got there at the senior citizen-friendly hour of 6pm. No wait. No crowds. Nice.
The food here is good, and the service is above par. The "fire broth" soup was a bit disappointing at $4 for a small bowl of what seemed to be *not spicy enough* tomato broth. But what do I know. The dosa made up for any letdowns though. A dosa is similar to a crepe and filled with various mushed up delectables, like creamed spiced potatoes and cashews, which is what we got. You rip off a piece of the dosa and scoop up the filling with your hands, then dip the handheld package into tomato or coconut chutney, or sambal, which is a smoky lentil type sauce, and my personal favorite. It's messy and you better have clean hands, though they do provide forks just in case. We also got a sprouted mung bean salad (sounds weird and healthy, but is delicious and healthy), and some onion pakoras, which are like Indian onion rings! We left pleasantly full, but not in need of unbuttoning our pants, and we were ready to find out what The Secret was, since Alex had a bootleg copy of the Oprah-endorsed self-help fad of the month. We made fun of the horrific cinematography, genies with man boobs, and general cheesiness of the whole production, but agreed that it couldn't hurt us to have more positive thinking in our lives. The attitude of gratitude! Even I'm a sucker for catchy catchphrases.

My hot Saturday night date was with Sara, and we roasted up a free-range chicken, made mashed potatoes and asparagus with some spring garlic that I got at the Farmers' Market. Sara said she could make gravy out of anything, and she was right! Just look at her working those honey and chicken fat drippings!
We nurtured our spiritual sides with some ice cream, a few games of Yahtzee and we were sleeping like babies by 10:45pm. Not quite like the sleepovers I had when I was 13, when we stayed up all night watching MTV and practiced kissing techniques on our own arms, but I'm thankful Alex and Sara stayed over, and I didn't get attacked by the Zodiac Killer, which might've happened if they weren't there!

IN MY BELLY

2007-02-14T11:47:00.000-08:00

1. Lundberg Rice Chips - Discovered these hippy chips while I was in Hawaii, but of course they sell them at Whole Foods. Really crunchy...kinda like tortilla chips but made with brown rice. My favorite flavor is the Honey Dijon, but they're all good and slightly healthier than standard chips or Frito Lay Scoops.

2. Grilled 5 Spice Chicken Sandwich from Out the Door in the Ferry Plaza building, my 2nd home. It's expensive for a Vietnamese sandwich ($8!), but there's no weird chicken knuckles in there, like you might get for $2 on Clement Street.

3. In my concentrated efforts to save money, I've been trying to bring my lunch to work lately. Don't laugh, I'm trying to buy a house, and I don't have rich parents. They are still extremely lovable, just not rich. Anyway, Moosewood frozen dinners are my current favorite lunch-on-ice. Same Moosewood as the famous vegetarian cookbooks. The Farfalle & Spinach Pesto Sauce is really good. There are baby portabellos in there, the pasta isn't gummy and the portion is just about right for lunch.

4. Rigatoni with sausage, tomatoes and cream. Ooh! I made this recipe (see recipe section) for dinner the other night. So easy and D was really impressed. So I was I...even ate it for lunch the next day. Which I rarely do unless I'm trying to save up for a house! The recipe calls for farfalle, but you can use what you want, and I added sauteed mushrooms and random sausages that were in the fridge. Random sausages are always nice to keep on hand...

PESCHERIA

2007-02-13T21:11:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day is kinda silly right? I say that only until D forgets to give me a card, six dozen roses and a Whitman's sampler, then all hell breaks loose and it's suddenly the most important holiday ever.
Seriously, I already got the card, and we already got our Valentine's dinner out of the way, so I think I'm set for this year. By going tonight instead of tomorrow, when restaurants will be overcrowded, overpriced and overly unenjoyable, we managed to have a kickass dinner at a new spot called Pescheria. It's right around the corner from our house on Church at 29th, so I had some ideas regarding convenient post-dinner romance, but we ate too much and now he's sitting on the couch watching the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show, and I'm writing this. Sexy!
I love Pescheria. It's a really casual vibe inside, but the quality of the fish (it's mostly seafood) and food in general is impressive. We started with some Sweetwaters from Hog Island (oysters in case you don't know what the hell I'm talking about) which were super fresh and beautifully presented with star anise and peppercorns sprinkled on the plate. After that we polished off some lemon-marinated tuna and yellow beets, stuffed clams, orrichette with wild mushrooms and finally an arctic char dish with a poached egg on top. You can see why we might not be feeling romantic after all that, oh, plus some cannoli and poached pear with mascarpone for dessert. Splurging for cupid!
Of course I forgot the camera, but I'm telling you, it was all good. The orrichette was our favorite dish if we had to pick. There were so many different types of wild mushrooms in there and some rapini, all noodling around in one of the best cream sauces I've had in a while, maybe ever. For a while I thought the alfredo sauce at Pasta Pomodoro was awesome, but I would never admit that in a nationally published and widely read blog! I trust you all to keep my secrets when I become famous.
Zzzzzzzz Good night. Spread some love tomorrow and always. It's Black History month too!

ZESTY

2007-02-10T17:51:00.000-08:00

My friend Shauna said I should get a microplane. She said it would make the zesting part of my life a whole lot easier. Since zesting is a such a HUGE part of my life, and I had a $100 gift certificate at Sur la Table, I ponied up and got one.
It kinda looks like the shaver thing they use when you get a pedicure...the thing that basically cheese grates the dead junk off the bottom of your feet. Only with the microplane you can flavor your food with the shavings. Try that with your old foot cuticles! Ew.
Last night I tried it out and I'm happy to report I have a new favorite tool in the kitchen. I was making a quick little dessert...fried up some apples, honey, brown sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and the zest...poured it over some vanilla frozen yogurt and HOLLA! D and I were eating homemade sundaes in our jammies, debating WHO IS ANNA NICOLE'S BABY DADDY?
Of course, and unfortunately, our lives don't solely consist of lazing around in our pajamas eating dessert. I also made a nice little crab salad for dinner. I got lazy and frivolous at Whole Foods, opting for the $28.99/lb lump crab meat, instead of sorting through the shells myself for $7.99/lb. So sue me. I marinated the crab meat with some shallot, lime juice, a little red wine vinegar and olive oil, while I was chopping up some fennel and tearing the lettuce into perfect bite-size pieces like I'm known to do. More dressing, some avocado and it was a perfectly light Friday night dinner.
A direct contrast to the huevos rancheros I made this morning for breakfast. I used flour tortillas, not corn, and I'm sure my version wouldn't impress anybody's abuelita, but it gave me and the D enough fuel to hit the gym, so Viva la Raza!

IT'S BEEN A WHILE

2007-02-10T08:25:00.000-08:00

A lot of you have been wondering where I've been and begging for a new blog (ok, it's my bro this time not mom, but thanks for asking!). Between the Super Bowl last weekend, American Idol twice a week, our horny, drunk Mayor, and of course Anna Nicole Smith, I've been busy with the news and gossip and trying to buy Prince's headscarf on eBay.
Speaking of the Super Bowl and being horny, my friend Alex really enjoyed the roasted asparagus with feta. Roasting asparagus is too easy, and it still makes your pee smell which is always fun. I just drizzle them with olive oil and sea salt (trim off bottoms first), toss on the cookie sheet to coat, and roast in a single layer for about 8 minutes in a 425 degree oven. Yum. There were sausages too...I got three different kinds of Aidells at the market; smoked duck, bratwurst and Burmese Curry which seemed to be the most popular. That's me frying 'em up! Do those jeans make my butt look big? Drats.
The sirloin bites with bloody mary dipping sauce did not score a touchdown (figures...it's a Rachel Ray recipe), but my cupcakes always make up for any kitchen fumbles (annoying football references end here). Spoiler alert: these are not homemade! I know my baking skill limits, so I stick with Duncan Hines devils food cake mix and Betty Crocker whipped cream cheese frosting. I know it's not organic, but I never said I was perfect. I'm glad I made two dozen, cuz most people wanted more than one. Kelton secretly pulled me aside and asked, "is there a one cupcake per person limit?" I had three.That's the Super Bowl update. Thanks to baby Ramona for not pooping on our bed during naptime!

PARANOIA!

2007-01-31T09:36:00.000-08:00

When I find a piece of my hair in something I just cooked up at home, it's not a big deal. It happens. Sometimes there are ants on the kitchen counter, or in the sugar bowl, and it's no big whoop right?
But when I go out to eat, I blindly expect that there won't be somebody else's boogers in my borscht, or roaches taking dips in my dessert. Now I can keep an eye on such things in my hundreds of hours of spare time, when I'm not trying new recipes or avoiding the gym. Check out this article in today's SFGate about restaurant kitchen inspection reports. They are publicly available! Maybe people don't wanna know, but in case you wanna get skeeved out: SFGate
article

SUNDAY NIGHT SUPPER

2007-01-28T21:37:00.000-08:00

This is what I made for dinner tonight: pork tenderloin, homemade scalloped potatoes, and spinach with fried shallots. I rubbed the loin with cumin, salt, ancho chili powder and pepper. Damian said it looked like a horse's penis. I'm just telling the truth.

The 'Burbs

2007-01-28T19:54:00.000-08:00

D and I need dressers. Now that we're cohabitating, it's the right thing to do; have some proper dressers for our clothes and sundry items y'know? Mind you, our stuff isn't just laying around in piles on the floor or anything--there are closets--but grownups have dressers, and before we get a dog, we must be assured in our abilities to properly take care of things, so we need them ok?
We got close once after a trip to Ikea--bought a matching set and everything--but after it took D five hours to put together the tv stand, also purchased on said trip, we decided the dressers were lame and promptly returned them. Who wants to put your panties and socks and delicate pantyhose in particleboard boxes that could collapse in an earthquake anyway? I don't even wear pantyhose, but I might someday.
Trips to Design Within Reach, EQ3 and Room & Board, were fruitless. Too cheap, too expensive, too ugly, too short, too fat, too not perfect...it felt like high school all over again. So, we took a trip to Corte Madera in the suburbs of Marin, our dresser hopes and dreams vested in West Elm, after seeing some potentials in the winter catalog. Annnd here we are, a week later, $1500 unspent (is West Elm furniture really worth it?), living our picky dresserless lives.
Of course there's a happy food-related ending to this unfortunate tale, and that is our discovery of a little breakfast joint we happened upon, called the Half Day Cafe. We didn't even know what town we were in, but a nice old man named Jackson told us it was Kentfield, and he even stopped by our table mid-meal to ask us how we liked the food, discuss Marin real estate prices, and tell us about the three businesses he started (hello suburbs!). The last time someone stopped by my table in the city, he wasn't wearing pants and needed a dollar to catch the bus.

Cute old guy aside, the food was pretty standard. D got the "Hong Kong Special," which didn't include a massage but did have fried rice with eggs on top; I got a potato mess with cheese and eggs and too many bell peppers. But we really got into the local spirit with the Half Day Dough Gods, which were deep-fried sourdough balls, kinda like doughnut holes, but not sweet and way more dense. They came with orange zest butter (yum), jam and honey for slathering, and we were pretty full by the time the rest of the junk showed up. The fresh pastries of the day looked like a good choice for the next time we get lost out there (orange currant scones and fresh biscuits), and the menu suburbanly referred to their blueberry pancakes as "blubes." Cute stuff.

IN MY BELLY

2007-01-28T08:52:00.000-08:00

I didn't write much last week and I know it's been hard on everyone. Bear with me. I've been cleaning out the cupboards, trying to "use up" stuff, and it hasn't been that inspiring. Bottled pasta sauce, frozen pizza, celery and ranch dip...I think I'm going downhill. A few worthy items though:

1. Granola made by ME. That's right, I like to walk around barefoot and go on nature hikes, so it's only fitting that I'd try and make my own granola. It turned out ok, but I don't think Kelloggs will be calling any time soon.
2. Samusa soup and tea leaf salad from Burma Super Star in the Richmond. Me, Alex and Kelton got there at the right time and didn't have to wait an hour. This place only keeps getting more popular, with recent profiles on the Food Network, Check Please and Bay Area Backroads. I wish they would expand already.
3. Ginger cake at Chow on Church St. That would be the warm ginger cake, with hot caramel sauce, pumpkin ice cream and fresh whipped cream. Hands down, it's my favorite dessert EVER. Fancy dancy fondants, souffles and chiffons are nice and all, but this is the kind of dessert you want to take home to meet your parents. A "real keeper."
4. Mixed vegetable soup from Lotus Garden Vietnamese on Mission St. Just needed a little nuoc cham (the spicy red stuff) to kick it up a notch (that'll be the last time I ever say that). It's not the best Vietnamese I've ever had, but the homestyle vibe completely makes up for it, with Cathy the owner chatting us up while her kids did their homework at one of the tables. Just like at my grandma's house. Well, not really, but you get the idea.

More later, I'm cookin' tonight!

I AM A WILD CARD LOCAVORE

2007-01-24T09:42:00.000-08:00

I know...I didn't know what a locavore was either, until I read this recent article in my Food & Wine mag. http://www.foodandwine.com/articles/how-to-eat-like-a-locavore

If you don't want to read the article (it's short, don't be lazy), a locavore is somebody who only eats and cooks with local ingredients (local usually meaning within 100 miles). There are varying degrees of locavorism (word nerd alert) from X Game extreme, to moderates like myself. I try and buy local produce, cheese and meat, but when it comes to Oreos and Costa Rican coffee beans, well, I guess I'm not fully committed. Maybe you find this whole idea annoying, and fear I'm turning into a hippy, but it's actually pretty easy for us spoiled foodies in the Bay Area to eat this way, and not have to shop at Safeway (horrors). Now if I lived in Detroit, we all know I'd be plumping up on the chili dogs and cheese fries, so I guess I'll just stay here for now.

But the next time I'm trying to explain the satisfaction of buying my dirty radishes straight from the farmer who grew them, and why I don't eat strawberries in February, don't roll your eyes...I'm part of a movement! http://www.locavores.com/ Yeah.

JUST SO YOU KNOW

2007-01-17T09:31:00.000-08:00

I made tuna noodle casserole for dinner on Monday night. Don't be jealous. Don't be scared. Look in the recipe section. I eighty-sixed the pimentos and added some sauteed mushrooms, but you can trick out this creamy delicacy as you wish. Embrace the tuna noodle lover in you!

HOT HENS ON THE FRONT PORCH

2007-01-16T22:11:00.000-08:00

Tuesday night. It's cold, rainy and I'm late to meet the ladies for dinner at the Front Porch. They've already ordered wine, and there is somewhat of a Cajun Caribbean party popping off when I get there. By this I mean, the place is loud and popular with Mission hipsters in de rigueur fatigue colors, skinny jeans, and facial hair, eating buckets of fried chicken amid the found-this-cute-stuff-at-a-yard-sale themed decor. I like to think this place completes a lowbrow, high-quality, hipsterized trinity of places to eat in the outer Mission neighborhood (the founders being Emmy's Spaghetti Shack and Blue Plate). But enough about that, and onto what we ate.
Cute cornbreads shaped like corn on the cob alert! Good consistency, but don't forget the chili butter.Then there was my favorite Kumquat soda (previously mentioned in this blog), a creole-style Waldorf salad (mmm...mayonnaise), and ricotta fritters with tomatoes and greens to start. Ho-hum. What can I say about this place that you haven't already heard...the food is pretty good--not high-fiving awesome--and the service is inconsistent. That said, our Cuban waiter got props for steering us away from the guava dessert, with a lengthy explanation about proper guava poaching techniques. Good to know. zzzzz

Nobody got on the fried chicken bandwagon, (though I've had it and it's better than average-see article in today's SF Chronicle Food section about the fried chicken trend; there were three orders of the vegan stew (against my normal group dining rules, but dietary restrictions were in effect); and I got the dungeness crab porridge. Fine, ok, it was all good, but not pee-in-your-pants awesome. Desserts were a highlight though, with a dependably delicious yellow cake/chocolate frosting combo, and more fritters-this time with plantain and sweet potato, bathing in a pool of gooey chocolate. Kate said they "tasted like the fair" all fried up and powdered sugar. Yee-haw! Thanks to the ladies for helping me flesh out my dreams of becoming a "dining consultant." It's got a nice ring to it right?

HOME ON THE RANGE

2007-01-15T09:55:00.000-08:00

Didn't have any time to write this weekend between getting my hair cut, dealing with a broken car window (thank you neighborhood miscreants), going bowling, hiking, watching the Descent, and playing Guitar Hero among things (I am a woman with diverse interests).
I managed to keep myself properly nourished though.
Some highlights:

The huevos rancheros D made on Saturday morning, with minimal guidance and only two sacrificed tortillas (too much butter in the pan made 'em see through!). The oversized Thomas' English Muffins on the side were an added carb bonus.
Sunday night we were gonna get our South Indian eats on at Dosa, but didn't want to wait 30-45 minutes (was it the Monday holiday or is that place still really popular?), so we ended up at Range, a worthy if not superior substitute. Of course I forgot the camera, because I'm new with photo shoots before I eat, but I'll get the system down soon enough. Their coffee-rubbed pork shoulder reminds me why pork products are my favorite food group. It comes out glistening the deepest most delicious brown I've ever seen. If pork can be pretty, and of course it can, this was one hell of a sexy pork shoulder. Jewelled swine. It disappeared pretty quick, and so did my roasted chicken, with hen of the woods mushroom and almond bread salad. The bread was oiled and tarted up with a subtly perfect meyer lemon vinaigrette. I would've licked the plate if nobody was looking, but it was crowded and I looked cute, so I never got the chance.
Friday night I did some cooking, tapas style. The garlic shrimp was easy, and the leftover puddle of lemon juice, italian parsley, garlic and red pepper was the best part. Glad I got the baguette. I tweaked a scampi recipe...used white wine instead of vermouth, added red pepper flakes, you get the idea. I also tried a new cauliflower dish, which was a bit labor-intensive, but nice for a change from my patented cauliflower soup. Marinated mushrooms, italian parsley, and fried up parmesan-coated cauliflower bits...see the recipe in my new recipe section. I used fresh, not bagged cauliflower from the Farmers' Market, cuz it's in season and that's how I roll. I am very hip hop.

IN MY BELLY

2007-01-10T13:52:00.000-08:00

1. Dried Black Mission figs from the Whole Foods bulk section. A little pricey, and really plump. Did you know figs are really an inverted flower, and they come in two sexes? Hermaphrodites and females...females being the edible ones. Go figure.

2. Horchata from Victor's Taqueria on Townsend. Not watered down or too sugary, tons of cinnamon and really creamy. Can't say their food is noteworthy, but the cashier who calls everyone guapo/guapa is a nice lunchtime ego boost.

3. If you don't know about Specialty's cookies, you better find out. Get whatever is fresh out of the oven (yesterday was semi-sweet chocolate chip) and enjoy using your fingers to scoop the melted goop off the inside of the bag. Don't put the bag on any important papers or cashmere sweaters though, cuz these cookies leave serious grease stains! Healthy.

It's getting cold and windy out there. Eat well!

THIS CAME IN A BOX

2007-01-08T20:22:00.000-08:00

I will admit that I have ordered many a Domino's pizza at 3am in the morning, but that was in college where the only other option was a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit from the Hardee's drive-thru.
Now that I'm more or less all grown-up, my taste buds have matured, and I live in one of the best food cities in the world, I can be as picky and choosy as I want with my takeout.
On the menu last night was Pizzeria Delfina for a gourmet, only-in-San Francisco pizza party! We're talking broccoli rabe topped thin-crust pizza, and marinated beet salad with ricotta salata for dinner.

Disclaimer: when it comes to pizza, I LOVE NEW YORK, but given the lack of New York style pizza available in our city, I'm willing to go all artisanal-housemade-fennel-sausage-fresh-stretched-mozzarella on a pizza joint.
I've tried almost everything on the regular menu, and you can't go wrong with any of it. The salumi (fancy Italian meats), spicy cauliflower and Insalata Tricolore are my favorites. Bonus items show up on the menu every night in the form of two special pizzas, maybe a calzone or other one time deals that won't be on the menu tomorrow, so you better get it while you can! Last night we had a pine nut and currant tart with some goo in the middle that was similar to pecan pie filling. Woof.

MADE WITH LOVE

2007-01-08T10:29:00.000-08:00

It was a good weekend for food and cooking in my little Glen Park nest.
Went to the Farmers' Market and stocked up on some winter bounty...satsumas, Sonoma Wildflower Honey, arugula, radicchio, persimmons, chard, etc...
Fresh produce makes me giddy. Sorta like my first french kiss with David Doyle back in 1984, only with less confusion and spit.
Scene: I was waiting for my parents to pick me up after my first co-ed dance held in the posh gymnasium at Blakelock High School (think big hair, bleachers and basketball nets). We were standing on top of a snowpile, and I had kicked back a few stolen airplane bottles of peach schnapps, so I was ready.
And so it goes, a few excited moments of tongue-dueling with a rat-tailed dirtbag, to the woman I am today, thrilled by paying a lot for organic lettuce and grass-fed beef. Progress!
Oh yeah, about the food.
Saturday night was a board game extravaganza at our house (don't laugh), and I wanted to have some sweet snacks to serve with the tea and Yahtzee (stop laughing, I have the Yahtzee Deluxe edition and it's very chic). I whipped up some macaroons which were super easy and delicious. Threw some dried cherries on a few for dramatic effect.
The flipside of success is of course failure and crappy cookies. While Damian and Kelton geeked out over Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit game pieces, I became increasingly unimpressed with my overbaked oatmeal, chocolate chip, and orange cookies, but everyone lied and said they were "ok", so whatever.

On to Sunday, when I achieved much culinary greatness with my Farmers' Market swag. Even in the middle of winter, I turned out a salad as bright and fresh as any summer day! The recipe is from the Ferry Plaza Farmers' Market Cookbook, my current favorite. The recipes, and generally useful information, is organized by season and ingredient. Inspiring pictures too.

I also made a white bean with winter greens soup (I used chard), which is perfect for these cold winter nights that we don't really have. They say beans are a magical fruit, and it turns out this soup had many healthful and intestinally stimulating effects. Sorry D. Ferry Plaza Farmers' Market--Believe the Hype!

IN MY BELLY

2007-01-05T11:52:00.000-08:00

1. Burger from the Slow Club. The only "gourmet" burger I ever want. Comes with perfect fries. Get some of the garlic aioli for dipping.

2. Vegetarian Corn Dogs from Trader Joes. I don't like a lot of fake meat products, but I also don't want pig snout and anus in my corndogs! I'm just sayin.

Stay tuned for my first guest column from some friends who just took a trip to Nicaragua. I've seen the pics, and looks like there were some good eats!

BALLS TO THE WALL

2007-01-04T18:04:00.000-08:00

So, I've had a few questions and comments from some curious readers (hi Mom) about the title of my blog, and there are a few explanations I'd like to share.

Most importantly my father, who recently passed away, loooved his women. Specifically, he liked them a "little trashy" (direct quote), and when referring to the objects of his questionable affections would say, "that is one spicy meatball!"
Thanks Dad, for never being perfect, but always endearing and forever loved.

The other two explanations don't really matter I guess.

But MEATBALLS DO MATTER, and my vote for best in San Francisco goes to: A16
No surprise there since they feature their balls on Meatball Mondays (otherwise only available during lunch Wed.-Fri.).

Now, these balls aren't in any co-starring role like at Emmy's Spaghetti Shack, whose spaghetti and meatball dinner is just fine thank you. But at A16...the dreamy balls stand on their own—magnificently succulent orbs of beef, pork and lamb, with the usual suspects like eggs, breadcrumbs, Parmesan, and ricotta—which I think is the key to these irresistably light and moist balls. Thank you A16, for giving me this opportunity to say 'balls' five times now. Classy!

Other notable balls:
Bill Murray, wacky camp counselor at Camp White Pine in the cinematic classic Meatballs.

AND Damian's aunt Violet's swedish meatballs in grape sauce, which I just had for the first time a few weeks ago, but I understand have an important place in the Fagan Family Christmas history.

That's it for now. Meatballs are all the rage!

HITS AND a big miss ON THE NORTH COAST

2007-01-01T17:44:00.001-08:00

Went up to Mendocino for a little end of the year quiet. Me and the D have a secret spot that I could tell you about if you ask nice...outdoor hot tub, chipmunks and deer outside the window, fireplace and lots of cozy nooks. A few things about the food up there...bad news first. The $125, seven course, New Year's Eve dinner at the Heritage House off Highway 1, was one of the biggest letdowns in 2006.

"Everything from soup to nuts" was wrong D said, and that's putting it nicely. We thought we were on Punk'd or something, only we're not celebrities, so it just turned out to be some good old hilarious reality! There was grit in the scallops, cold oxtail ravioli, disastrous pepper ice cream, and so on and so forth.
Did I mention it took over THREE HOURS? You do the math. I am not lying when I tell you that our waiter ended our evening by saying "thank you two for sticking through it." Whew.
Onwards and upwards in 2007!

The GOOD news:
Breakfast at the MacCallum House, an historic landmark built in 1882 as a wedding gift to one lucky bride-to-be. Dad, are you reading this? Buffalo hash with sage hollandaise, wild chanterelle omelet with Vella jack cheese (from Sonoma), local huckleberries...

Then we rolled up to a guy selling barbecue in the parking lot of the Navarro General Store off Highway 128. Potentially sketchy yes, but the baby back ribs turned out to be a fine meal.

Bakery props go to the Garden Bakery on Albion Street in Mendo, where we scored the house zucchini bread wrapped in saran wrap like mom would do, an expertly sticky cinnamon roll, and a cheese and blackberry danish. The kind of stuff you want to find in a sleepy coastal town when your goals are reading, snacking, drinking tea and napping. Party time.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

IN MY BELLY

2006-12-29T11:12:00.000-08:00

1. Kumquat Dry Soda. I had it at The Front Porch, but it looks like this guy Josh Spear makes it. http://www.joshspear.com/item/dry-soda/

2. The house-made mortadella at Quince. When I was a little food shortie back in the day, eating mortadella sandwiches out of my brown paper bag lunch, I thought the white parts were cheese. Oh dear, what I've learned.

3. Banana Crisps from Trader Joes. Not too sweet and not too thick.

4. Classic India Spice Tea. Yogi Tea makes it. My kind of spicy.

5. It's no secret that I love picholine olives. Whole Foods has them most of the time, so does Rainbow. No marinades or herbs, they are perfect in their firm, green nakedness. Ooh.

HOLIDAY EATS IN SOUTHFIELD, MICHIGAN

2006-12-29T10:12:00.000-08:00

I'm usually anti-travel, anti-holiday nonsense anytime in December, so when my boyfriend suggested I travel to Michigan to participate in the annual Fagan Family Christmas Celebration, I tried to come up with excuses.

It’s not that I don’t like his family, I really do, but I usually stay in San Francisco for the holidays, volunteering, baking cookies, enjoying a quiet city, and relatives by phone only.

When my excuses ran out and he bought the ticket for me, there was some consolation in knowing that I would be enjoying the infamous Michigan chili dog, also known as a Coney Island, and a variety of confusingly territorial names in other parts of the state and country. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michigan_hot_dog

Now, my endorsement of this horribly-bad-for-you delicacy may confuse anyone who knows about my usually staunch adherence to an organic, grass-fed, free-range, preservative-free diet, but BEHOLD!
It's childlike Christmas joy on my face when greeted with the heaping plate of chili cheese fries, a usual accompaniment in the whole heartstopping experience.

Yeah, the chili sauce may look a little bit like diarrhea, but the taste is anything butt.
Ahem.
There are all types of rules and regulations applying to chili dog consumption when in Michigan, none of which I truly understand or care about, but the boyfriend likes his with ketchup. Look at that glorious plate of slop!

I prefer mine with the chili sauce slop, mustard and onions. Some oddballs even eat them a little bit naked with no onions at all! Cute, but can you even imagine?!

So it turns out the Fagan Family Christmas went all right, we made it back to San Francisco in one piece and I’ll be ringing in a New Year with the memories of those dogs in my heart and in my stomach. Burrrp.

Oh! A special shoutout to Hellenic Coney Island (aka Nick's) at Twelve Mile and Evergreen, if you happen to be in the area. Go Pistons!